Not ready for kids

I decided tonight that kids should definitely not be on my short-term horizon – sorry Mom. But, I think logically this is the right call, for three main reasons:

  1. I love to sleep. Sleeping has never been super high on my list of priorities, but I think I’m finally hitting a point in my life where I’m excited to be going home early at night because it highly increases my chances of being bed at a timely hour.
  2. I don’t know stuff™. I figure that as a Dad, you have to know stuff™, so that when your kids say, “Dad, what’s the capital of Nigeria?”, or, “Dad, what year did Iraq invade Kuwait?”, or, “Dad, how would I figure out the equation to cook the perfect sausage?” you have to know these things. Sure, I reckon I make something up quick-smart, but that’s not quite the same. My Dad certainly knows a lot of stuff™; conversely, I found out at a work quiz night tonight that there’s a crapload of stuff™ that I really don’t know.
  3. Gadget unfriendliness. All my gadgets that I love the most – PS3, LCD TV, iPod, Macbook Pro, etc etc – are not friendly for little, peanut-butter and jelly covered fingers. I haven’t yet worked out how to “child-proof” my gadget collection (though admittedly I also haven’t given it much thought). And, after seeing the havoc that Zach could wreak in 10 minutes in our New York apartment, I find the thought of children and electronics quite frightening, really!

I have no doubt that one day I want to have a truckload of kids, but I also have no doubt that “one day” will not be coming anytime soon!

Posted in everyday life
20 comments on “Not ready for kids
  1. Jean says:

    let me say that having kids would give you more satisfaction, stimulation and fun than any gadget you could possibly own would.

  2. KJ says:

    Kirsty – thanks for the support. You’re my new best friend. Keep up the good work.

  3. gerrod says:

    Ben and Roo – No, not feeling any pressure, to be honest I have no idea where the article came from, it’s just what I was thinking at the time.

    Marc – I take your point about knowing things, however, I just feel like there’s still big gaps for me to fill. Regarding gadgets, I have no idea how you can say “there goes that excuse”, and “much rarer these days” in the same sentence! And lastly, The problem with the sleeping is more than just getting home early (by which I sort-of meant “after a big night on the turps I like to try and get home before the tube closes” – which is around midnight) – it’s also the whole, “my kid doesn’t sleep through the night so my wife and I were up every two hours” factor.

    Kir – good call. So wise… !

    Jean – clearly you don’t own a PS3… :-)

  4. Ant says:

    A truckload? Mate you better get started soon, you don’t want to be too old to run around with them … 30 is knocking :)

  5. Shane says:

    You can get some pretty sweet gadgets with kids, Little People, Weebles and Thomas the Tank Engine :) Sure beats that PS3….

  6. Ben says:

    This story is a good comment generator… wonder if it’ll show up in the blog stats entry when the 2000th article rolls around?

    Even more curious to see if any entries show up about your new born kids when the 2000th entry rolls around :)

  7. Ben says:

    One more thing…

    Just imagine the ultimate gadget – the Thomas PlayStation 1.0.

    It comes with:

    - Colour changing and self-expanding case.
    - Two wireless controllers.
    - Rechargable power supply.
    - Multiple input/output options.
    - An advanced learning cpu.
    - The ability to connect to other systems (in about 18 years time).
    - Speech recognition engine.
    - Unlimited games.

    It also *may* be the most visually appealing system you’ve ever seen. It’ll weigh a tiny 4-8 pounds upon delivery. However, you may need to update your tv cabinet annually as it does grow in size.

    Where’s the downside I hear you say?

    The initial cost of ordering one of these puppies is the cost of good night out with the wife and some drinks.

    However, such a system is so addictive that you’ll spend thousands over its lifetime on accessories.

    The best news is, if you look after it right… it’ll pay itself off and maybe even look after you when you retire.

  8. Stace says:

    Interesting discussion. No ‘pro kid’ comments were made by anyone without kids. Conversely, no ‘anti kid’ comments were made by anyone with kids. This confirms the age old wives tale that having children kills brain cells.

  9. Stace says:

    Hang on, no one’s mentioned Gerry spelled Mum ‘mom’…. hee hee hee! so American…

  10. gerrod says:

    That’s because “Mom” was educated in Jamaica/USA hence she insists that’s how we spell it! Plus it makes it easier to differentiate between my Mom and Kristy’s Mum. If only there was an American spelling to Dad…

  11. Ben says:

    You could call your Dad – Dod – it’s a mixture of Dad and his name Rod.

    What do you think?

  12. Ben says:

    You have a new 3rd place btw… w00t!

  13. Marc says:

    Do you think that maybe people without kids only see the bad bits? As someone who couldn’t see themselves having kids I am probably well qualified to say that the good bits well and truly outway the sacrifices that you make. The fact that all comments from people with kids are positive probably has more weight to show that having kids is a blessing rather than a curse. Even though we are similar ages we are at different stages in our lives and it’s no one else’s place to say whether anyone should have kids now, later or ever. It’s a personal decision, but one that I personally would never even think of changing.

  14. Stace says:

    Marc I was joking! I know I’ll be having kids, it will be great.

  15. Ben says:

    Now that we have this sorted, let’s start talking about religion and politics?

  16. Shelley says:

    Wow, religion and politics Ben, that’s very ambitious. I think I’ll stay politely out of this one…

  17. Louisa says:

    Wow I can’t believe this story has so many comments.

    Just thought I’d say that I’m one of the few without kids who is a supporter – and no, this isn’t a new thing. I’ve realised the positive impact that kids can have on your life over the last 8 or so years since I became an Aunty and have had some really special relationships with my nephews and niece. In fact I’m going to see some of them today and I can’t wait!

    Also, just one other thing, I think we all assume that it will be easy to pop one out when we decide it’s the right time, but in reality most of the chicks around this blog only have about 5-7 years before it might get a bit hard. Hehee does that freak you out :)

  18. superyam says:

    1. Don’t worry – you’ll still love to sleep.

    2. Don’t have an answer? Just ask the wife – she knows everything.

    3. Feed them vegemite! This little known catalyst produces superhumans called “Aussies” and they will soon be improving™ all your shonky gadgets.

  19. gerrod says:

    Marc – yep, I think you’re right, no-one can say when anyone else should have kids except for themselves. Hence why I stick with my original title which indicates that I’m not ready for kids.

    I’m certain that one day I will be, and I completely agree that the good bits will outweigh the bad… however, for me, that time is not now.

    Did anyone else hear that John Howard is converting to Buddhism? :-)

  20. Stac says:

    Well put G-man. BTW I think we’re ready for a new post/article!

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